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The State I Am In
I woke up two hours ago and quickly realised that this was about to be another one of those days. In ‘those’ days, I begin to question just about everything. I ve got a slightly sick feeling in my stomach, sad look on the face and an enormous need to be left alone. The level of ontological security goes below zero. No sense of continuity, no sense of order, no nothing. Does what I am doing make any sense at all? It starts off with a question: So what do I do today? I should work on my PhD, of course. But, does it make any sense at all? Is what I try to say, meaningful? Will I be able to make a valuable contribution to my scientific field? I feel a big responsibility. And then the snowball effect: What do I want from my life? Where do I want to live? Do I want a family? I seem to have a few problems to handle my identity project. There on a horizon, I can see different available projects of my own identity. Of course there are parts of my identity that I take as constant – my gender and the place of origin. But all others are subject to change. Well, that’s not so bad since one’s identity formation should be an open ended process. It can’t be just completed at some point. Which can be quite positive, it makes our lives richer and more colourful.
By | December 31, 2004 | Topics: Uncategorized |